Let’s talk about cigarettes and girls today.
How do you feel when you see a guy smoking in a tea shop or anywhere? Do you find it unpleasant? Do you become judgmental over him? Or do you find it a very normal thing going around on daily basis and ignore it right away? I guess, you choose the most latter option.
But, now, let’s switch the case of gender in this case. Same question; what would be your very first thought if you see a girl smoking? No matter whoever she is, wherever you see or how she looks, do you opt your mind to think the same that you did in the previous case?
Do you think something else? Do you ever find it extremely unpleasant? OR…OR…Do you become judgmental over her character?
Well, this doesn’t sound good in anyway but somehow, we do, right? Don’t lie to yourself here. If you find it normal enough as compared to a guy, then, you shall skip this article and carry on your other precious tasks. Else, let’s move ahead.
In today’s time,
many of the girls’ smoke. It’s not a thing to disagree about. The only thing is that, we don’t see them all around like boys. Girls who smoke tend to hide themselves always. They don’t want any of the known or unknown people to witness them pulling the puffs of the so-called stress relieving thing. They always choose to find a corner of a tea shop, dig themselves there and smoke. Unlike the boys who can smoke in public/open places, girls don’t find that freedom here. See, how dominant our society is, girls even cannot smoke like boys even though they are not doing any harm to others. The case of ‘male dominated society’ might sound a bit odd here but, it surely is a relatable thing. This is also a case of freedom; freedom to consume something on own will and consent.
The reason behind…
Why don’t girls feel free to smoke? Why do they have to run few kilometers away, find a suitable place and do their job? And why she has to make sure that not a single person who knows her or even an acquaintance finds her smoking?
Nothing, but, all because of our mentality; our SENSATIONAL behavior to characterize or categorize her.
Another thing, there a huge difference in our thinking when we see a girl in a dance bar smoking and when we see a normal girl in a normal place smoking. Also, in our movies, we only see a girl smoking who is related to bad things or prostitution. Well, the gist lies in there.
Whenever we see a girl smoking, we never can take this thing normally. It’s unacceptable and indigestible in our community, isn’t it? The lipstick stains on the filter part of the cigarette in an ashtray immediately give a heavy shock to us. It becomes a solid matter of discussion which should not be. A series of questions start to flow through our mind right away. Who she must be? Why did she smoke? Is she not going through a good time? Is she not a girl with good characters? Does she belong to another type?
And then, just like she left the stains on the cigarette filter, she leaves a wide scope for people to mark stains on her character.
She feeds people a good opportunity to let them judge and objectify herself. That’s how she will always be a girl with ‘not good’ behaviors/characters on other’s perspective.
Why is it the matter to be judgmental only in the case of girls? Why not boys?
The reason might be the kind of stereotyped society we are living; the kind of mentality we are handed over from previous generation. See, girls are always considered as a kind of human being with good habits, behaviors, moral values and attitude in our society. Unlike the boys, she has to look good, be good and do well everywhere every time. She should not be involved in any kind of activity because of which she might be judged or pointed fingers on. Or, even she should not indulge herself in the things that mostly a boy does (smoke is very far thing to talk about). That’s how the term ‘tom boy’ generated maybe. A girl is supposed to be someone with better qualities and morality.
This might be the reason why a girl smoking is not acceptable.
Cigarettes doesn’t come on gender basis unlike other things. It’s not written “only to be consumed by male” or “for gents” on the package. But, still, when those soft and beautiful fingers hold a stick and when those pulpy lips kiss them, it becomes such a disapproving and negative thing.
By this thoughtful article, I am not trying to promote cigarette consumption for the girls out there. I am neither supporting girls who smoke nor I am suggesting them to smoke openly in public places as it’s a matter of right and freedom. All I am talking about is ‘why are we become so judgmental and sensitive over a girl’s activity’, which actually is not a crime or something that offenses others. Why girls are always judged or characterized or objectified? Why are we soooooo filled out with negativity? I am not relating it with huge topics like gender equality and women empowerment. It’s a very tiny thing but we should not ignore as it shows how we, our mentality and our society is.
Here’s a poll. Please vote for the option you think about it. The votes come anonymously if you are sensitive about your identity.